Control Freak

“Trust in the Lord and lean not on your own understanding”, one of the big lessons that we are learning right now in life. A lesson that is hard yet humbling. Growing up in North America in middle class leaves us with a false sense of security and control. We can access almost anything we need, we have all of our basic needs met and if there is something we don’t like in our lives (home, job, friends….) we are told we have the power to change it. While an element of this is true, I feel that is gave us a false sense that we are in control of our lives and it feeds into a self-centered worldview. As a family we have been learning to totally rely on God and those He places in our lives when things are totally out of our control. Sometimes we have no water, or the plumbing or electrical fail and we have to rely on others to point us in the direction to get things fixed. We run into times when we cannot even communicate due to the language barrier and it can be frustrating. We cannot run to our doctor when a child is sick, we cannot hop in our car and get around ourselves. Sometimes a simple task seems so complicated due to cultural differences, and paperwork is endless in our work permit process. We try so hard to plan ahead, have things organized and ultimately be in control, but we have had to lay those plans aside and submit to the ways before us, last Monday we planned to go to Addis to try to get a visa extension, only to find out last minute that a holy (holiday) had been declared so the offices would be closed. I have seen a baby girl slip away from this world and felt helpless, I have witnessed great need and feel like I want to take away all the suffering but it is out of my control. But through this loss of sense of control I have learned to lean into God and put my hope in Him more. He is in control of this broken world and even though horrible pain and suffering exists His big picture and ultimate plan is to restore. I have witnessed lives changed, hope and joy despite hardship, powerful testimonies and so much more. There is a daily reading that has struck a deep nerve that I want to share, it is by Frances J. Roberts in “Come Away My Beloved”:

 “O My child, lean on Me; for I am your helper; I am your shield and your buckler. Yes, I am your strong tower and support. No evil will befall you, for you are surrounded and protected by My presence, and no evil can touch Me. Yes, let your heart rejoice in Me, and occupy your heart with praise. There is no need I will not fulfill as you praise and worship-both your needs and the needs of others.

                Man has contemplated the power of faith and of prayer, but only rarely have I revealed to men this far greater power of praise. Doors are opened by prayer and faith, but by praise and worship great dynamos of power are set in motion, as when a switch is thrown and an electric power plant goes into operation. Praying for specifics is like requesting light for individual houses in various scattered places, while worshiping and praise flood the whole area with available current.

                I do not discount prayer and petitions. I only show you a more marvelous way-a faster means of brining more help to more people. So many need Me. So little time is available. Turn loose your praises, and in proportion to your liberality, you will see My generosity expressed in infinite magnitude.

                Do not try to analyze each need. Leave the diagnosis and the mechanics of it in My hands. Complexities are nothing to Me. They exist only in your mind, sown by the enemy, to dull your faith. Ignore all this. Weigh nothing except the love of My heart. Ask nothing unless you ask your own heart how much love it holds for Me. Hold Me closely; never let Me go. I will bless you, and I will make you a blessing.

                I will make you a blessing. Do not think you will take a blessing to someone, or hope that I will send a blessing. I will make you, as My ambassador, a sweet savor of life and grace. Through your saltiness others will become thirsty. Through your joy others will long for reality…..You be and I will do.”